Kicking and Screaming

I told Mr X that his birthday (which was yesterday and he is 37 and I totally didn't forget. Really.) present from me was tickets to go see BB freaking King.
Right now he's in Arizona working. Again.
First he asked how much the tickets were.
I cringed. Because really? Week's worth of groceries and I almost had second thoughts but I don't care. I'll sell a damn kidney.
Then he asked what time it started.
8 pm.
Silence.
"Isn't that kind of late for Hurricane?"
"No, he won't be there."
Then he asked how far away it was and I spoke as quickly as I possibly could so that maybe he wouldn't notice that I said 2 hours which would mean that we'd be gone basically all night.
That's when he pretended that his cell phone was cutting out.
So I hung up and called his sister to ask her to watch the kids for the night of the concert.
By the time Mr X finally called me back, it was set.
I am going to see BB freaking King and he's going with me. End of story. Sort of.
Except for the part where I'll have to drug him and then have him carried out to the car to be driven to the show and possibly cuffed to the table.

I think after what it took for me to actually get the tickets I should be able to not have to fight about it.

Because I had to pick up the phone and push buttons and talk to actual real life people. And if you had heard me today, you would maybe be thinking that it was my first time using the phone. Because I said stupid things like "If I could I'd bear his children" or "Do you think he'd mind if I sat in his lap while he sang?" or "Um, hi. I'd like um to BB Freaking King tickets um buy now. I have um visa. Or a kidney."

So, if you answered the phone today and thought that maybe you were talking to someone who was perhaps mentally challenged, I'm sorry. That was just me.