Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Before the Thrill is Gone.

I have been dancing around the house all night. I can't stop. Mr X had to hold me down because I wouldn't stop jumping up and down and he feared that I might give myself a concussion if I hit the wall with my head again. What? You don't bang your various body parts (unintentionally of course) on the walls when you dance?


Well. Anyway.

So excited, danger to myself, ok, we're all caught up.

Because I am going to go and see BB Freaking King in concert in August!!

Sorry- still jumping. I'm just so damned excited! See, every time I've ever had a chance to go see him, something has come up. This time? I don't care if Mr X cuts his arm off on the way, we're tournequeting that thing and enjoying the damned concert even if I have to dose him with valium to stifle his crying.

But that's not really the issue.

The issue is that we have never left Hurricane in the care of another person.

And it's not because of me.

It's Mr X.

At first I thought maybe he felt sorry for the person who would have to watch him. Yesterday Hurricane pulled a shelving unit down on his sister (She's totally fine) and there is that whole plot to destroy the house thing he has going on. But I thought with proper warning, a plan and maybe a toddler sized straight jacket they'd be fine.


So, I thought maybe it's the lack of trustworthy people? My parents are too far away and his parents, um, I can't even complete that without laughing. Seriously. We just saw them this weekend and I couldn't even look at her face because she had painted her eyebrows purple.
Yes. Purple.
How can you leave your child in the care of a woman who would do that to their eyebrows? And I must point out that it wasn't like she had plucked her eyebrows and then filled them in with a little purple. No. She had actually painted purple arched eyebrows over her real ones.
I'm afraid Hurricane would return looking like Barney.
Also? She scares him.
And me.
Back on track.
Trustworthy people.
His sister. She's awesome and would be completely capable of watching him. Also? Friends of ours who he loves and I sometimes think would like to adopt would be great and perfectly willing.


It's him. Mr X.

He simply cannot stand the thought of someone else taking care of him.
He is trying to convince me that the only way he can go is if he can take his phone and maybe spend the concert under the table talking to Hurricane.
Or perhaps sneaking him into the concert with us.
Or I should just go by myself or maybe take a friend and wouldn't our new neighbor like to see BB freaking King?

I think the only reasonable solution is to club him over the head and drag him in there. I will handcuff him to his chair and hold the phone. If necessary, I will duct tape his mouth shut.

Unless you have a better idea?